Make it Stop

Ahhhhhhhhhh! Please make it stop. I don’t want to do it anymore. It hurts, it burns, I’m so sore. I think I kind of know what Adam felt like when he said to God “The woman you put here with me—she gave me the fruit “; well the woman God gave me tricked me into this with her beauty and guile, with promises of fun and feeling good about myself, but she never mentioned the PAIN. Ok, so I’m a big baby.

I was beginning to think there was nothing to this running thing, but everything changed when we went from 30 seconds of running/5 minutes of walking to 60 seconds of running and 4 minutes of walking. You would have thought I had gone from crawling to a triathlon the way it was kicking the crap out of me. Although it might have had something to do with the fact that I tried to do it after softball practice and after softball practice cool-down at culvers; and after a practice, mind you, that I forgot to stretch before. Thank goodness for the severe thunderstorms and tornado watches that cut our run on Sunday short. But after Monday off with my friends Ibuprofen, Keats, and a Literature 216 test, I was ready to face the challenge of the 60/240. Although I almost died I have completed another step on the couch to 10k and am ready for next time.

What seemed to help this time was stretching before and after the run but tomorrow will be a better judge of this strategy. 

DA DA DA DA DA DA DA RUNNING-MAN

Greetings, Not-so-Fatso-ites. Today I thought I would show you some of my cool running gear. Jennifer and I got cool arm bands for our Windows 7 phones since the running app, Couch to 10k, is what is pacing our running. The app tells you when to run and when to walk, even if you’re listening to music. My arm band however didn’t fit over my huge, powerful, python-like biceps, so I had to figure something else out. Actually, I couldn’t stand the idea of not being able to see my phone (what if the commissioner was texting me?) so I modified mine. Not only can I look at my phone whenever I need/want to, but I feel like I have some sort of super gadget. Like Iron Man’s armor or Spider-Man’s web shooters, Running-Man has all the powers of a cell phone on his wrist. Good looking husband and father of five by day, but by night or early morning I’m Running-Man, protecting the city from…well it’s a work in progress.

As far as my calorie count is going, I had a set back today when my old nemesis, Hardees’s, which is very close to my work, beckoned me through the invitation of a co-worker.

“Come to Hardees’s, Jason. There must be something for you to eat here.”

“Ok, Hardees’s, but just a little something.”

“How about a salad, or now that you’re here a BIG BAG LUNCH. BAWHAHAHAHAH.”

“Hardee’s…Nooooooooooo…Whyyyyyyyy...ok.”

Hardees’s new Big Bag Lunch is a Double Cheeseburger, Hot Ham and Cheese, small fries, apple pie, and a 21 oz drink, all for 5 bucks. Evil genius? I think so. So, after I consumed the BBL, which was awesome by the way, I went and entered the calories into my calorie tracker on my phone. It was about 1400 calories, and I had a zero calorie beverage; if you add the pop to it it’s more like 1670, not to mention if you get free refills.  So, needless to say if I don’t eat dinner tonight I will stay within my calorie counting for the day. I’m soooo hungry.  

I'M BACK BABY!!!

I’m back on the attack, and running up a storm. That’s right I’m running. Last year’s weight loss sputtered out almost as fast as this blog did but I’m getting back on the horse. I’ve been counting my calories and doing occasional biking since February and have loss about 7 pounds, but I kind of hit a brick wall and the weight started creeping back (dang you Hardees and your Thickburger Thursdays); enter my beautiful wife. She texted me last week and wrote “hey I’m going to start running you should run with me.” RUN? Is she nuts, I hate running. People who run just to run have a Forest Gump complex “I just felt like running-G”.  Although…there would be someone else to keep me exercising, I would be spending time with my smoking hot wife, and I could buy cool running stuff, so I said I would and here I am. We started a program called Couch to 10k and so far I’ve run twice. It starts off slow, 5 minutes quick paced walking and 30 seconds running in intervals for 50 minutes. Every week it increases your run time so that by the end of 13 weeks I should be able to run a 10k; we’ll see about that. So to all you Not-so-Fatso fans; I’m back with what should prove to be some interesting blogs about my adventures in running.

Weight: 283 lbs

OH and If I get 100 people to follow my blog at the end of 13 weeks I’ll run a 5k race so tell your friends about me the Not-so-Fatso.